5/26/2006

Breaking News

PT's Kruisers Take Potrero Hill
- San Francisco

In a pre-dawn raid today, the elite unit of Kvatch's Kommandos known as PT's Kruisers stormed and captured Potrero Hill, thereby securing these massive armored personnel carriers pictured below.








The Kruisers utilized these MUNI buses throughout the day, in an endless assault on misinformation, moving out in waves and through a flanking maneuver, secured all points North and East of their Potrero Hill base of operations.

These brave troops pushed on through the entire day running the risk of pidgeon attacks, and being snatched up by small children with chocolate-coated fingers or bus drivers doing their pre-trip inspections.

We spoke to the leader of this very special force, Kommander PT, who took a moment to elaborate on his unit's performance today:

"It wasn't easy for them. There were a lot of obstacles, and I'm proud of how all my troops carried out their orders without fail. I knew going into it that this type of elite operation required the securement of public transportation. Everyone knows it's one of the best ways to get around San Francisco. Once we secured the Potrero Hill base, it was just a matter of getting the word out to the public. My soldiers took care of that today. These Kruisers really put the PT in public transportation."


Below is a picture we caught of one of the Kruisers' radio operators who just got confirmation of the WMD situation and is passing it on to local residents...


One soldier who was carrying the RUMSFAILED banner was quoted as saying, "I'm not scared. I'm just doing my duty to save my country, ma'am."

Truly an American hero. Fight on soldier, fight on.

6 comments:

windspike said...

A Righteous Deployment! Victory is ours. Might I dare say Mission Accomplished?

PTCruiser said...

Mission Accomplished indeed, Kommander!

Kvatch said...

KOMMANDER CRUISER...AN OUTSTANDING DEPLOYMENT. MUNI, BART...INDEED ALL OF SAN FRANCISCO ARE NOW IN OUR HANDS.

YOUR COUNTRY APPLAUDS YOUR SERVICE!!!

K.K.

PTCruiser said...

Just proud to serve, Kommander.

Human said...

Finally.The Military is defending Truth, Justice and the American Way!
Peace

glenda said...

Lots to make up for, the military, but the leadership has been abysmal. Carry on, brave soldiers.